5 Ways You Might Be Quenching Your Child’s Curiosity (And What To Do Instead)
- Vanessa Morris, Founder & Creator
- Sep 4
- 4 min read
If you’re raising kids, you know the “why” questions are endless.
Why is the sky blue?
Why do I have to go to bed?
Why can’t I watch that show?
Sometimes it feels like your entire day is spent answering questions that range from adorable to exhausting. And let’s be honest—it’s easy to get tired, distracted, or just want the conversation to end.
But here’s the truth:
Curiosity is one of God’s greatest gifts to our kids.
It’s how they learn, explore, test boundaries, and discover truth. When we lean into their questions, even when they feel inconvenient, we’re not just giving answers—we’re shaping their hearts, building trust, and discipling them in the everyday.
5 Common Curiosity-Quenchers
When we dismiss, rush past, or over-correct, we unintentionally send the message that their thoughts don’t matter. Over time, that can shut down not just their curiosity, but their openness with us.
Here are five ways we may be quenching curiosity without realizing it—and what to do instead.
1. Saying “Because I said so.”
🚫 This closes the door on wonder and doesn’t actually answer the heart of their question.
✅ Instead:“That’s a really good question—let’s figure it out together.”
2. Brushing them off when we’re busy.
🚫 Makes them feel like their questions aren’t important.
✅ Instead:“I can’t talk right now, but remind me later and I’d love to hear more.”(And then follow through.)
3. Only giving the “right” answer.
🚫 Teaches them there’s only one way to think.
✅ Instead:“What do you think? Why do you think it’s that way?”
4. Over-correcting every little detail.
🚫 Can make them afraid to share their thoughts, worried they’ll get it “wrong.”
✅ Instead:“That’s interesting—tell me more about how you see it.”
5. Rushing them to move on.
🚫 Sends the message that their wonder is inconvenient.
✅ Instead:“Hmm, what made you wonder about that?”
Curiosity Doesn’t End with Childhood
This isn’t just about little kids asking silly questions.
As our kids grow, their questions get bigger—and sometimes harder.
My oldest son is starting to enter that season. I’ve noticed how much the culture around us seeps into his world—through school, friends, social media, music, shows, everywhere.
And with it comes a wave of questions:
“Why can’t we watch that?”
“Why don’t we listen to that music?”
“Why does it matter if we’re different from everyone else?”
Sometimes the questions come rapid-fire, and honestly, sometimes I don’t have an immediate answer. But I’ve learned that the worst thing I can do is shut him down or make him feel like those questions are off-limits.
Instead, I welcome them. All of them. Nothing is taboo in our home.
When your teen asks the hard questions, don’t panic—lean in.
Often I’ll turn the question back to him: “What do you think? What do you feel God thinks about this?” And it’s been powerful to see him begin to listen to the Holy Spirit for himself.
That’s the goal, isn’t it? Not just to raise kids who can recite the “right” answers, but to raise kids who walk with God and know how to hear His voice.
And honestly, when I give him space to wrestle, I often find that he makes the choice himself to turn away from what the world is offering. He’s learning that while we live in the world, we don’t have to be of it.
Our Kingdom Assignment
That’s our assignment as parents, grandparents, caregivers, and spiritual mentors.
Not to control or silence.
Not to give pacifying answers.
But to guide, to shepherd, and to empower our children to bring every question, every doubt, every thought into the light of God’s presence.
We’re called to steward their journey, not script it.
Welcoming Every Question
So here’s my encouragement:
When your toddler asks for the hundredth time “why?”... lean in.
When your middle schooler pushes back on your rules... lean in.
When your teen questions your family values in light of what culture is doing... lean in.
Because in those moments, it’s not really about the question. It’s about connection. It’s about trust. It’s about discipleship in the everyday.
Questions aren’t the problem—they’re the doorway to connection.
Don’t be afraid of your child’s curiosity—it’s the very soil where faith and wisdom can grow.
Next Steps
If this resonated with you, and you’re longing for more tools to slow down, connect, and build a home that flourishes—I’d love to invite you into The Intentional Family eCourse. Inside, I walk you through simple rhythms that bring peace, purpose, and connection into your everyday family life.
And for ongoing encouragement and resources right at your fingertips, the Intentional Family App is a powerful next step. It’s like having a guide and cheerleader for your family life—all in your pocket.
Because our kids only get one childhood—and we only get one chance to steward it well. Let’s make it count. 💛
Comments